That Was Then... Back in the Olden Days, touring cyclsts used to struggle along on overloaded bikes, schlepping tents, cookstoves, fuel, pots and pans, ground cloths, stinky sleeping bags, mosquito netting, spare clothing, toilet paper and a ton of other junk. The overloaded bikes weighed a ton, and needed eensy-weensy chainrings and huge rear sprockets to enable them to crawl laboriously up even the smallest hill.
	...This Is Now! That was all before the greatest cycling invention ever: Credit Card Touring! The credit card tourist doesn't need to tote any of that junk! Just bring along your trusty credit card, and buy whatever you need, whenever you want it! Now you can ride a modern wonder machine made of exotic metals and fancy plastics, carrying nothing but the essentials! At the end of a hard day in the saddle, you can stop at a luxury hotel to recharge your batteries. You'll also be able to recharge your cel phone, your global positioning system, your PDA and your iPod. Try doing that on a wooded campsite!

That Was Then...

Back in the Olden Days, touring cyclsts used to struggle along on overloaded bikes, schlepping tents, cookstoves, fuel, pots and pans, ground cloths, stinky sleeping bags, mosquito netting, spare clothing, toilet paper and a ton of other junk.

The overloaded bikes weighed a ton, and needed eensy-weensy chainrings and huge rear sprockets to enable them to crawl laboriously up even the smallest hill.

...This Is Now!

That was all before the greatest cycling invention ever: Credit Card Touring! The credit card tourist doesn't need to tote any of that junk!
Just bring along your trusty credit card, and buy whatever you need, whenever you want it! Now you can ride a modern wonder machine made of exotic metals and fancy plastics, carrying nothing but the essentials!

At the end of a hard day in the saddle, you can stop at a luxury hotel to recharge your batteries. You'll also be able to recharge your cel phone, your global positioning system, your PDA and your iPod. Try doing that on a wooded campsite!

FasterCard Titanium,
the Credit Card Touring Cyclist's Credit Card!

FasterCard Titanium, is the first credit card ever to be made from Titanium 3AL 2.5V alloy for light weight and durability. In addition, the FasterCard Titanium, is drilled out for increased lightness, without compromising the embossed numerals or the special rare-earth magnetic stripe on the back.

The FasterCard Titanium's magnetic strip, despite its light weight, is the sturdiest, highest coercivity magnetic strip available on any major credit card. Even after thousands of uses, it still registers on the first swipe 99.993% of the time, so you never need to waste time waiting for some sales droid to tediously key in your number manually!

The FasterCard Titanium is highly exclusive, too. It is only available to Real Cyclists like you, not to the hoi polloi!

Apply for your FasterCard Titanium Now!

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In Commemoration of The Inventor of the , Nanodrive, Product W, Carrababy, Tork-Grip Universal Torque Wrench, Real MAN Saddles, Symmetrispokes, the Geomagnetic Booster, and POWerwheels, Sheldon "Genius, But Modest" Brown

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In Commemoration of
The Inventor of the ,
Nanodrive, Product W, Carrababy, Tork-Grip Universal Torque Wrench,
Real MAN Saddles, Symmetrispokes, the Geomagnetic Booster, and
POWerwheels, Sheldon "Genius, But Modest" Brown

George Brown photo

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