Sheldon |
Proudly |
---|
Don't you want your child to be a Champion Cyclist? Of course you do! Just because you never made it to the Olympics or the Tour de France, doesn't mean that you can't bask in the reflected glory of your child's achievements! If you want her to be a serious competitor, you've got to start while she's young!
Many parents wait too long to expose their youngsters to the joys of competitive cycling. Influenced by overcautious pediatricians, they often wait until their offspring are old enough to sit up wearing a helmet, in an old-fashioned baby seat or trailer...but doesn't YOUR child deserve a head start? The sooner you get them on the road, the sooner they'll get used to the sights, sounds, aches and pains of cycling, and the sooner they'll learn to persevere in their training regimen regardless of how tired or sick they may feel, or how nasty the weather may be.
If you let your baby's most formative months go by being a "crib potato" she may never develop the fierce competitive drive that will be needed to become a champion cyclist in the twenty-first century. She'll be racing against children of other parents who CARE about the sporting development of their little ones, and if she's going to be competitive, the time to start is NOW!
That's where the new ShelBroCo Carrababy ® comes in!
The Inventor of The Carrababy baby carrier, Tork-Grip Universal Torque Wrench, Real MAN Saddles, Symmetrispokes, Geomagnetic Booster, and POWerwheels, Sheldon "Genius, But Modest" Brown |
---|
George Brown photo |
*Guaranteed for the life of the baby, or two weeks, whichever comes first. This guarantee does not apply to any Carrababy product that has been subject to abuse or neglect, off-road cycling, on-road cycling, or attachment to any saddle other than a Real-MAN saddle . Void where prohibited, prohibited where void, keep away from children and animals, use only with adequate ventilation. Note: Misuse of this product may lead to death or even serious injury!
Check Out All These Fine ShelBroCo Products: |
and these products from our sponsors: |
---|---|
|
Ordinary leather is made from animals that have been painlessly slaughtered in modern, high-tech abattoirs, where everything is clean and neat and restful new-age music calms the animals before they're humanely, painlessly dispatched. This is all very well for the animal's peace of mind, but research has shown that it dosn't produce the toughest leather!
TerrorLeather ® is a superior, tougher product. The patented TerrorLeather ® process begins when the cattle are fed fodder laced with FormaldeHide ® a very, very unique proprietary pre-tanning chemical concoction. While on the FormaldeHide ® diet, the cattle spend several weeks in a refrigerated enclosure with simulated hailstorms occurring every four hours.
For the day of the actual slaughter, recordings of cattle in their death throes are played all day at high volume on a special state-of-the-art sound system, to get the subjects into the ideal state of mind. A special "eau d'abattoir" fragrance is also misted over the whole enclosure, just in case some of the subjects don't figure it out before hand. This pre-treatment has been scientifically determined to produce leather that is, on average, nearly 3% stronger than conventionl "humane" leather. Nothing is too good for our customers!