Open AI
April 1, 2023
Time Travel
April 1, 2022
It's all about setting some kind of personal best -- well, personal fastest -- while actually going nowhere.
QuadraTech
April 1, 2021
Introducing ShelBroCo QuadraTech Chainrings and Non-Rotation sleeve nuts
Just not a year for jokes.
Sensors
April 1, 2019
Electronic shifting, power meter, cadence sensor, performance monitor, smartphone, GPS -- all connect without ugly, clumsy, fragile wires, thanks to the world-standard ANT+ communications protocol.
Power Powder
April 1, 2018
Boost your energy with ShelBroCo Power Powder. Special prices this Sunday of Easter and Passover.
RideGetting lost is a pain. Find your way home with ShelBroCo RideWithoutGPS, the navigation system that never lets you down.
Helium
April 1, 2016
Helium weighs only 0.13 times as much as air! Imagine what it can do for your tires.
Magic Paint
April 1, 2015
A pavement marking paint that does double duty as an illuminated warning signal!
Dent Removal
April 1, 2014
Remove those pesky dents in a flash!
ShelBroCo Sonics™
April 1, 2013
Meet the US National Highway Traffic Safety Administration standards with distinctive sounds.
SCB American WayNow you can OWN the urban bicycle of your dreams.
April 1, 2011
All the advantages of the classic ten-speed and of a modern ten-sprocket system
YOUR turn to turn the wrench
Bicycling advocacy takes a walk.
There is Only One Correct Way to clean and lubricate your chain!
The credit card for the Serious Cyclist!
The drivetrain of the 21st century!
Product W, the ultimate performance-enhancing drug, with Theobromine!
Safety with Style
April 1, 2002
It's probably too late for you--but don't you want your children to have a chance to become Champion Cyclists?
The Universal Torque Wrench!
Are you a Real Man? Then why are you still riding on a "unisex" saddle?
A revolutionary new spoke design makes spoke breakage a thing of the past!
Can't figure out your gears? Maybe you need a GearTel!
Use the Earth's magnetic field to enhance your speed!
Sinister corporations are trying to undermine the character of the Youth of America
by producing bicycles which glorify Evil!
Although I am well known to have no sense of humor whatever, my alter ego, Carapace Completed Umber, is silly enough for both of us. This page collects some of his postings to various bicycle-related newsgroups.
Are your spokes holding you back? Then you need new POWerwheels!
Vehicle or vestment? 101 Reasons Why Biking is Better than Blading.
Using old-fashioned solid bearing balls? No wonder you're so slow!
Not bicycle related, but funny.
From That Sceptred Isle
Be ready to ride the apocalypse!
Mountain-bike humor...no connection with Indian music, alas.
Last Updated: by Harriet Fell
It's all about setting some kind of personal best -- well, personal fastest -- while actually going nowhere.